I wouldn't know how to delete the e-mail there. Just a suggestion: disconnect your PC from the internet, or any other network, and set outlook to work offline. That should remove the message that the file is being send, and can't be deleted for that reason.
About the size of a e-mail to be send: Most e-mail providers (if not all) use the 10 MB limit. This is also the default for any Exchange server. Therefore, your e-mail can't be any bigger then that 10 MB.
I hope this solves your problem, but can you please post here what was the result of this?
Joost
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